this is about nothing in particular and also everything

The more I think about it, the more I realize that the death of Natalie Wood has set my personal standard for sordid celebrity clusterfucks.

 

That story had everything:

• fancy yachts
• Christopher Walken
• extremely tense dinners in public restaurants
• prolonged screaming matches
• huge quantities of wine
• three possible affairs
• a tell-all from a boat captain
• a decades-old DEATH PROPHECY that CAME TRUE

Like if that's not the level you're operating at with your tabloid drama, go home and stop bothering me.